We’re taught when we’re kids to be kind and to be generous. We’re told that it’s nice to share and that we should look after those weaker than us. We tell our kids this too, but somewhere along the way it just becomes too damn difficult, and inconvenient, to take anyone but (perhaps) our immediate family and friends into account. To be fair, these relationships can be minefields all on their own; taking copious amounts of energy to negotiate effectively. Essentially, we become insular, turning inwards, concerned only with maintaining the balanced rhythm of our own lives, ignoring the whole.
Who can blame us? It’s a competitive world out there and it’s not easy to “make it” anymore. But more than that, we are just overwhelmed. There is so much poverty, suffering and injustice in the world, it’s difficult to endure. So we shut down, cutting ourselves off from all the pain. We ignore the beggar at the car window; pretend the stray dog who scratches at your gate isn’t there. We don’t want to see, and more importantly, we don’t want to feel because feeling means having to do something, and we don’t have the energy.
The Importance of Compassion
The problem with this coping mechanism is that while we mitigate our pain, we also diminish our capacity for compassion. We become hard and cold; chewed up and spat out by our own cynicism. And what’s left? Well, very little joy, that’s for sure. The truth is some of the most profoundly beautiful moments in your life will be born of pain. It is only when we are open and able to feel true and unbridled compassion for others that we are really living. This doesn’t mean you have to give money to every homeless person you see or that you need to start an animal shelter in your backyard. It means you don’t have to block yourself off from the suffering around you. It won’t break you. It can’t because you are not separate from the world around you so it is really your suffering too. Don’t run away from it. Embrace it with all the softness and kindness you can muster.
It’s true that you can’t help everyone. But when you allow yourself to live your life with your heart open, it becomes easier to respond authentically to what does come your way. You can’t help every stray animal, but maybe you can help the one that scratches at your gate every day. Maybe he’s there because you are the one person that can help find him a home. And to that little creature, it matters. It won’t be easy. It’ll be inconvenient. You’ll have to shuffle your schedule around, buy dog food and put up posters. You’ll feel your heart want to shut down again just so you don’t have to go out of your way like this. You’ll hear yourself saying things like ‘I have a life you know’ and ‘this isn’t my responsibility’.
But you won’t listen and you’ll go out of your way anyway because you’ll realize that it’s actually not going out of your way at all. You and this being are one after all so by helping it you’re really helping the whole, of which you are a part. So you put him on a lead and take him for a walk. It’s clear he’s never been on a lead before, and he’s a little unsure. But he gets the hang of it quickly enough and looks up at you, his eyes full of trust and wonder. Your heart breaks, but never has a moment been more full, more meaningful and joyous than this.
Source: Silent Journey
Hālau 'Aha Hui Lānākila 