Contemplations …

Life … there’s another way to survive this competition, a way no one seems to tell you about … one you have to learn for yourself. It’s not about the race, at all. There are no winners or losers. Victories are counted by the number of lives you save. And, once in a while … if you’re smart … a life you save could be your own. Life was surely made for fools like me.

Intimacy is a four-syllable word for “here are my heart and soul; please grind them into hamburger, and enjoy!” It’s both desired, and feared. Difficult to live with and impossible to live without. Intimacy also comes attached to life’s Three R’s: Relatives, Romance and Roommates. There are some things you can’t escape, and others you just don’t want to know. I wish there were a rule book for intimacy. Some kind of a guide that can tell you when you’ve crossed the line. It would be nice if you could see it coming, but I don’t know how you could fit it on a map. You take it where you can get it and keep it as long as you can. And, as for rules, maybe there are none. Maybe the rules of intimacy are something you’ve got to define for yourself.

Remember when you were a kid, and your biggest worry was if you’d get a bike for your birthday, or, if you’d get to eat cookies for breakfast. Being an adult? Totally overrated. I mean, seriously. Don’t be fooled by all the hot shoes, and the great sex, and the no-parents-anywhere-telling-you-what-to-do. Adulthood is a great responsibility. Responsibility? It really does suck … it really, really sucks. Adults have to be places, and do things, and earn a living and pay the rent. Hello!? Talk about responsibility! It all kinda makes just wanting bikes and cookies look really, really good. The scariest part of responsibility: when you screw up and let it slip right through your fingers. Responsibility: it really does suck. Unfortunately, once you get past the ages of braces and training bras, responsibility doesn’t go away. It can’t be avoided. Either someone makes us face it, or we suffer the consequences. And still, adulthood has its perks. I mean … the shoes, the sex, the no-parents-anywhere-telling-you-what-to-do … that’s pretty damn good.

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