Every problem has two solutions:
1 – run away, or
2 – participate.
The choice is yours.
Our lives intersect with others all day, everyday. Sometimes we know these other lives well; frequently, though, the points of connection are brief and transient. Who are these people? How might they tell their own stories? What thoughts preoccupy their minds? What joys and troubles are coursing through their feelings?
“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eyes for an instant?” ~ Henry David Thoreau
If we could catch a glimpse of others’ stories … If you could stand in someone else’s shoes … hear what they hear … see what they see … feel what they feel … would YOU treat them differently?
All Are One … Live in Peace and Aloha
For it isn’t a man’s father, mother or wife
Whose judgment upon him must pass,
The fellow whose verdict counts most in his life,
Is the man staring back from the glass
He’s the fellow to please, never mind the rest,
For he’s with you clear up to the end,
And you’ve passed your most dangerous, difficult test
If the man in the glass is your friend.
You can fool the whole world down the pathway of years,
And get pats on the back as you pass.
But your final reward will be heartache and tears
If you’ve cheated the man in the glass.
(This poem was found written on
the wall of a cell in death row)
What causes us to procrastinate, and how can we change our relationship with this tricky habit? Self-compassion — kindness and understanding toward one’s self in response to pain or failure — may be the key to addressing procrastination and its cycle of negativity. A study by Fuschia M. Sirois of Bishop’s University in Canada found that people prone to procrastination had lower levels of self-compassion and higher levels of stress, which effectively looped back to increase the stress and further lower a person’s self-compassion. “Self-compassion is an adaptive practice that may…provide a buffer against negative reactions to self-relevant events,” writes Sirois. The implication is that by interrupting the loop between negative self-talk and procrastination, self-compassion may help us avoid the stress associated with procrastination, extricate ourselves from that downward spiral, and help us change our behavior for the better.
“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” ~ Carl Rogers
“You can search throughout the entire universe for someone who is more deserving of you love and affection than you are yourself, and that person is not to be found anywhere.” ~ The Buddha
For too long, too many of us have been entranced by heroes. Perhaps it’s our desire to not have to do the hard work, to rely on someone else to figure things out. But perhaps it’s time for us to face the truth of our situation — that we’re all in this together, that we all have a voice — and figure out how to mobilize the hearts and minds of everyone in our workplaces and communities.
“I alone cannot change the world, but I can cast a stone across the waters to create many ripples.” — Mother Teresa
It is the thirst of people for an easier life. But there is a trade-off between peace and convenience.
Experiment with such trade-offs between peace and convenience in your own life. What could be changed and what left alone to flower in its own way?
Our ability to experience love has nothing to do with getting love from someone else. We don’t need to be good enough or gorgeous enough in order to make love a dominant part of our daily experience. We are the only person who is responsible for how much love we experience in our lives.
So … take some time out today … each day … and get to know yourself a little better. You might think you know everything about yourself, but chances are there are a lot of things about yourself that you have ignored or overlooked because they weren’t “important”. Listen, and ask yourself how you are really feeling. Get out some nice paper and a nice pen and share these real feelings, as if you were writing to a best friend. Take this time to listen to yourself, and get used to the feeling. Ask yourself: what things are important to you that you are neglecting right now?
Take action to show love to yourself by honoring something that is important to you, even if someone else might not approve or think you deserve what it is that’s important to you.
As you go through the day, stop to remind yourself that you deserve respect and admiration, just for no other reason than that you deserve love. Let your heart open, and enjoy the feeling. This feeling can become a constant companion, and it becomes something we can share with the world around us.